here we go.................
I sit here watching Becoming Chaz... an Oprah documentary on the gender switch of Cher's daughter Chastidy who started life as a budding beautiful blonde headed blue eyed girl. My thoughts flash between my two budding beautiful blonge headed daughters and an old woman in the grocery store line commenting on a recent magazine cover, shocked. I switch the channels as my son walks in and out to "shelter" him and breathe in anxiety over rising gas prices and the failing heartbeat of the world that my children were born into. I breathe deep as I flip channels between Mob Wives and Bin Laden and Sister Wives and fires and droughts and famine and back to this documentary to catch a lady professing her thoughts on how the he/she has so much courage to truly be himself and my thoughts flash to small bald children shaved by chemotherapy and I wonder where the definition of courage has gone.
I breath deep watching my daughter hop so happy out of the car each morning and hold up i love you in sign language and pray with each step that she takes further away that she has the courage to say no to crystal meth and tatoos and gossiping. and the world. and the courage to say yes to christ. I take a deep breath and pray that I have strength... courage to NOT do what is easy but to do what is right. That when all other parents say yes to going to a rated R movie, that I stand firm. I breathe in deep the strawberry scented bubble bath and lock away the memory of mispelled words and dimpled hands. I breathe in deep the chaos and the busy and the mundane and look to the source of breath for strength and courage and exhale gratitude. grace. in abundance.
4 comments:
Okay, a deep breath here after that. So much ugly in this world. To seek the "source of breath" is utterly a life line, isn't it.
There is so much ugly in this world, but when we slow down and breathe in gratitude, it seems less overwhelming when we focus on HIM!
Isn't is crazy what watching tv for a few minutes can bring into our homes. There is so much madness happening, that we are called to live in, and to stand out from. Sometimes just wondering how to do that messes with my head, and then I remember the breath, one of the most divine gifts. It is the breath, that very breath of God within each of our breaths that reminds me He is there is all things, and we can get through this, one breath at a time. Great blog, I love the name.
Nics
Nicky, thanks. I don't even know why I kept watching... I guess not so much because I was interested in the story of her changing to him, but in the way everyone shown was responding to the situation like it was above normal and courageous. Thanks for the comment... I just started blogging, so that means a lot! Do you have a blog?
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