Ten Things... you should know about Texas.

1. We say things like Ya'll and Well bless your little heart and fixing to, and might could. For example...  Oh ya'll...  bless her little heart.  She might could go back to the haidresser and fix it a tiny bit right thar.  I'd go tell her myself, but I'm fixin to go to Wallyworld.
2. Unlike the rest of the country, we only have two seasons.  hot.  and hotter.  Occassionaly we will have to switch from a/c to heat in the same day.
3. Don't Mess With Texas is an anti-litter campaign.  Not a phrase that a bunch of drunk & angry cowboys decided to have made into bumper stickers. But seriously, don't mess with Texas, mkay?
4. If we had to name a famous battle, 10 out of 10 Texans would name The Alamo among the top 2, the other one might be that really good fight we all saw in high school.
5. Every Texas at birth is determined to be either a Texas Longhorn or a Texas Aggie. Like Romeo and Juliet, we are hence segregated to lives of bitter torment, taunting, and teasing from one side or the other.   
6. From August to January, we live, eat, and breathe football.  nfl, college, high school, peewee...  doesn't matter.  And we all believe that the Dallas Cowboys are God's favorite football team ever. None of us really understand why the Houston Oiler's left.
7. Going to the store is referred to as goin walmartin or goin to wally world.  Or in South Texas....  going to Wally Martinez.
8. It's not the ocean.  It's the Gulf. 
9. There are four basic food groups:  Whataburger, Chips & Salsa, Bar-B-Que, and Taquitos.  And when you order a coke, you may get coke, dr. pepper, pepsi, mr. pib, or anything brown and wet.
10. It is a common misconception that women from Texas have big hair.  In fact, this was out-lawed in June of 1989.  There is a special big hair task force (B.H.T.F. if you will) and they are doing their best to reach every last woman, bear with us.